This can make or break the weekend whether you know it or not. I know this is a hard time for you, but it is hard on your kid(s) as well. However they see you handling the situation is very much how they will handle it. Kids often do as they see, not as they're told, but by now, I'm sure you know that. I'm going to say something now, and I know I am oversimplifying it, but it is the absolutely truth, and that is:
BE HAPPY!!!!!!!!
Be happy that they are going to college, be happy they're going out on their own, be happy that they are becoming independent. This is absolutely vital in making them not really feel homesick, unless you want that. With all of this being said, just try and be upbeat about the situation, they know it's hard on you, they know you're most likely holding back tears, but that's ok. At the end of the day, we are still you're little boys and little girls, we always will be. Going off to college will NOT change that, I promise.
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Mixed Emotions
Ill be blunt in saying that your actions are directly related to how your child will handle the move from the home they have known for 18-19 years of their life to their new one, a 12x12 room shared with another person, and much less privacy. Parents, it is absolutely imparitive that you try and keep yourselves together (even you mom's). Why you ask? Because it is the little things that can make this a great experience for everyone involved, or a tragic one where the your child just wants you to get out of their hair.
Now, a little background on me:
I grew up in Cincinnati in a great home with my mom and dad, and up until the April before I graduated, I had NO idea as to where I wanted to go. A few years before (ok, seven), I had gone down to Tennessee to stay at Carson-Newman College with my youth group from church for Centri-Fuge. At the time, I was 11 years old or so, and didn't care about college one bit, (what 11 year old does?) but I just enjoyed the time there, and I liked it as a whole. Fast forward those seven years, and mom throws it out there that we should go visit Carson-Newman, so we do. And we love it.
May:
I graduated from high school, all worries aside. It was now time to be looking forward to my future, to getting into the south, out of the north, and getting a new residence away from home, and away everything familiar. The days flew by, the summer was gone, and the time to move was just around the corner. However, there was one more thing between me, and freedom (or so I'll call it). That was freshmen orientation, which your child will have to go to, and odds are, you'll be right there with them. Freshmen Orientation is a GREAT experience for both the you and your kids, because they get to meet the students that they are going to be with the next four years, and you get overwhelmed with tons of information that you will probably forget about by Thanksgiving Break, so it goes...
Anyways, If you child is going away for school, say more than 3 hours away, then it will be harder for you as parents obviously, because they won't come home every weekend, you won't be able to do their laundry (there will come a time where you wish you still could, trust me), you won't be able to cook their favorite meals for them once or twice a week, etc. However, don't let that get you down (kleenex yet?), because your child is about to grow in ways you never thought you'd see, they're not just going to be your kid anymore, they're going to become your best friend, they're going to call you believe it or not. And not because you've been nagging them, but because they want to talk to you. (See? It's not all sad!) They will ask you about your day, and you ask them about theirs. Although don't plan on them dropping the "fine." excuse just yet, it's still there, and I'm still plenty guilty of saying it myself, everyone is. Next up, the drive down.
Now, a little background on me:
I grew up in Cincinnati in a great home with my mom and dad, and up until the April before I graduated, I had NO idea as to where I wanted to go. A few years before (ok, seven), I had gone down to Tennessee to stay at Carson-Newman College with my youth group from church for Centri-Fuge. At the time, I was 11 years old or so, and didn't care about college one bit, (what 11 year old does?) but I just enjoyed the time there, and I liked it as a whole. Fast forward those seven years, and mom throws it out there that we should go visit Carson-Newman, so we do. And we love it.
May:
I graduated from high school, all worries aside. It was now time to be looking forward to my future, to getting into the south, out of the north, and getting a new residence away from home, and away everything familiar. The days flew by, the summer was gone, and the time to move was just around the corner. However, there was one more thing between me, and freedom (or so I'll call it). That was freshmen orientation, which your child will have to go to, and odds are, you'll be right there with them. Freshmen Orientation is a GREAT experience for both the you and your kids, because they get to meet the students that they are going to be with the next four years, and you get overwhelmed with tons of information that you will probably forget about by Thanksgiving Break, so it goes...
Anyways, If you child is going away for school, say more than 3 hours away, then it will be harder for you as parents obviously, because they won't come home every weekend, you won't be able to do their laundry (there will come a time where you wish you still could, trust me), you won't be able to cook their favorite meals for them once or twice a week, etc. However, don't let that get you down (kleenex yet?), because your child is about to grow in ways you never thought you'd see, they're not just going to be your kid anymore, they're going to become your best friend, they're going to call you believe it or not. And not because you've been nagging them, but because they want to talk to you. (See? It's not all sad!) They will ask you about your day, and you ask them about theirs. Although don't plan on them dropping the "fine." excuse just yet, it's still there, and I'm still plenty guilty of saying it myself, everyone is. Next up, the drive down.
So you're sending them off...
This time of year is hard for hundreds of thousands parents who are new to letting their beloved children out of their sight for 3/4 of the year. However, it does not have to be all that hard on you, and them. I'm writing this to let you know how a current student saw his situation, and the situation's of other students, and how they affected the parties involved. However, take what you read with a grain of salt knowing that my story will not be your story, and you will not go through the same things that me and my parents did.
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